All Text, Music, and Illustrations, including Paintings, Photographs, and 3D models, Copyright © 2022 by Jim Robbins.
BATTLING CURRENTS
Immersing myself in the upper San Joaquin,
I flowed with the current, following
my brother to a rock wall
on the other side. Suddenly I could see
a large group around the bend,
all naked, lounging on a cliff, one
woman squatting, all by herself.
I stared, unable to make out
her features. My brother suddenly
plunged back against the current, thrashing
until he reached the other shore. I remained,
gawking at naked men, one of whom
stumbled closer and gazed down at me
accusingly. I edged closer
to the strong, middle current,
suddenly sensing that swift water
might pin me to the rock wall
or sweep me down river if I slid out
a tiny bit farther. Suddenly
my overwhelming desire to see,
for the first time, a real naked woman—
vanished. I shouted to my brother—
two years older and stronger—but he
was already gone or wouldn’t answer.
As I inched along the slick rock, away
from the main current, back to a safer point
(where I could not climb out), I cursed him
over and over. Exhausted, nearly frozen,
with my last ounce of willpower, I flailed
through the water—so wildly it probably
looked like I was trying to beat the river
to death, but I somehow made it back.
Emerging from the water, I no longer thought
that my brother intended to harm me—
only that currents can be so powerful
that they can drown you.
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